I’ll never forget the day I sat there next to Nina holding our 5-week-old Nikolas. The words hit like a ton of bricks: “You have a mass in your liver.” Hmm. As well as I believe I can express how I’m feeling on paper, I’ll never be able to explain to you how that felt. […]

Read more "For Caregivers: The Best Guide I’ve Got"

I am so proud of how Nina and I worked through the journey of her disease. Sincerely, I look back at the last couple of years and there is nothing I wish I could go back to fix. There are no pieces I’d like to collect, put back together and make whole again. Zero regrets. […]

Read more "From Frustration to Forever Love"

I don’t know where to start…but I really do not want the beautiful miracle of my weekend to get lost in a debate between Religion and Spirituality. I know there’s a Heaven and I am 100% confident there are angels. Like, here…now. I think I’m hesitant to discuss Psychic Mediums because…well…I was raised Southern Baptist […]

Read more "Spoonbeam: The Dead Don’t Die"

I was piled up in bed Thursday night preparing myself for lights out. Feeling unsettled, I tried to read and listen to music but I just could not seem to wrestle away the thought something was off. There was a little anxiety sitting in my chest and it was bothering me (when this happens, something […]

Read more "Brilliantly Fill Your Pages"

Nice try, my man I don’t know how I’ll make you understand But I’ll try Sure, I cry How you’ve attached this to any sort of your pride Falls short of me And I really don’t even care enough to ask why Who doesn’t cry when somebody dies? Idiot Getting out of here for days, […]

Read more "But Grief, I am Me"

Have you found it, yet? Where you’re able to breathe without your regret? Because you know you could have done more Just remember the time you found her on the floor With the blood pouring from her head When you saw her you thought she was dead No I was just adding a new horrific […]

Read more "I am Grief"

I have written so much about our journey over the last two years. To be candid, it doesn’t seem fair to shut you out now. As hard as it is to write these days, I have to ensure the entirety of our story is captured, expressed and shared. There are lessons here – big ones […]

Read more "The Last 48"

The words used to pour out so freely at the beginning. I would search deep within, find my “place” and they’d just flow effortlessly. I wouldn’t even think about it. I’d never stare at the screen or try to find what fit – it just all worked when I found that “place”. But as time […]

Read more "Evolution"

One thing to know about me: I hate vomit. I like to think I’m tough – and I am – but put me around a pile of throw-up and I’ll be brought to my knees. Like, dude, I REALLY HATE VOMIT. And that’s what made yesterday ironically and hysterically funny. A close friend of ours […]

Read more "I Enjoy Sitting in Vomit – That’s How"

As tough as this road has been the last 22 months, I am thankful for each winding turn and each back-shattering bump. I really don’t think I appreciate how lucky we have been. Usually – almost always – the words that follow “You have cholangiocarcinoma” are “You have a couple of months”. As tough as […]

Read more "This Road"